Oh, Now I Get It

Have you ever had an epiphany that took a really, really long time to sink in? I think I have.

My clearest memory of my trip to Lake Tahoe a few years ago is the conversation I had with a woman working at the gift shop where I took hours to choose an absolutely magnificent kaleidoscope.  (I tried to get a good picture, but apparently photographing through a kaleidoscope exceeds my level of skill). 

As we chatted, she told me all about her newest love. The exact details escape me now, but it didn't take Dr. Phil to know that, while she was crazy about the guy, the relationship was doomed to fail, maybe spectacularly. I listened, nodded sagely and told her she was right to stop before it went any further.


The woman looked at me, puzzled, and said she had no intention of stopping before it was too late. She was happy right then and, even if her love didn't last forever, she was going for it; if she got hurt, she got hurt. "Um," I thought, "that's nuts." 


Now, a couple of years later, I think maybe I was wrong and she was right. She knew that happiness isn't inevitable, and that we don't get an unlimited supply of chances to grab it. Happiness doesn't come with a no-pain guarantee, but we can't let all our chances at happiness slip away because we are worried about trouble.


Trust me, there's no need to worry about trouble: trouble finds each of us, one way or another. Someday the state trooper will knock, or the oncologist will phone, and we will get our chance to be unhappy for a while. Sorrow finds us, no matter how we try to cower in the dark; it is joy that needs a nightlight.


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